Havelock Ellis once said, "Dancing is the loftiest, the most moving, the most beautiful of the arts, because it is no mere translation or abstraction from life; it is life itself."
That said, I'm betting my moolah the following dance moves, collected from various points in a 30 yr old guy's life aren't exactly what you'd call art nor would anyone want to get caught doing it.
The Macarena - The mere fact that 2 old guys were dancing (well not dancing as much as... swaying) in the video should have been an omen but this song became the second longest running #1 and best selling debut single of all time - in fact it holds the distinction of being the #1 greatest hit wonder of all time. Beat that William Hung.
The Chicken Dance - the 2nd worst thing to happen to parties (the first one, the clown/mascot). As a kid I would dread the moment I'd hear accordions blaring over the speakers and my mother forcing me to dance this with the other kids. Torture. But then again, it'd be slightly acceptable for kids to dance to the chicken tune, but adults? I rest my case.
The MC Hammer Dance - there's a reason why MC Hammer isn't as popular now as he was in the 90s. The Hammer Pants? The golden sparkle shirt? Or maybe the Hammer Dance? No matter how annoying the MC Hammer Dance was, it was horribly cute when it was Cameron Diaz dancing it (unless you're a dead ringer for Cameron Diaz, I suggest we leave this un...danced ).
Country Line Dancing - back in the late 70s, life went back to normal for most people when line dancing died a natural death. However, like a phoenix it rose from the ashes of its former self and was brought back to life by no other than Billy Ray Cyrus' Achy Breaky Heart! Doesn't it make you cringe, remembering back then how fun it was to line dance? (or wasn't it!?)
The Robot - Although I say you shouldn't be caught doing this, there are a few talented others who can do the robot with the precision only a real robot can have - and make money while doing it - or 15 minutes of fame! If there's one dance move I can be ambivalent about, this would be it. Just make sure you can pull it off.
History has a habit of repeating itself - in a few years, we might have another Macarena or another chicken dance to torture our kids with. So keep your eyes peeled; you'll never know what dance move might be created to make you the laughingstock of your next reunion or potential blackmail material.
What other dance moves do you secretly know but wouldn't get caught doing? Share yours.
Andy Biggins knows that life isn't a box of chocolates but he loves it as sweetly as if it were! Travelling and Gadgets rule his world, and if you want to know more about his thoughts on just about those 2 topics, swing by his site The Big Life
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